One of those important things that you don’t hear about growing up, well most of us, is that most people ‘pass’ in life. Most of them are nowhere near the kind of fearless, confident, comfortable, always happy and satisfied state we may think them to be in. Or we suspect, or fear that we don’t come up well when compared to the rest. That we are inadequate or scraping through at the best of times.
It is a revelation for many growing up or later that pretty much everyone else has faults, defects, everyone has doubts, everyone has weaknesses and most of us have fears of some kind, some unbearable, some persistent and some just floating around here and there.
Once you realise this a couple of ideas come to the fore.
1) all those people out there running businesses and looking spiffy, all those people looking undeterred, self-assured and grounded, all those ‘authors’ and ‘leaders’ and others with a title of authority often cobble things together, fly by the seat of their pants and make it up along the way (actively hiding the fact or not telling anyone about it)… the idea that most of them are somehow superhumans, well, most of them most of the time just aren’t. They are like you and me.
2) considering this what have you got to fear? what stands between you and going about realising your dreams, putting forward your ideas, making things happen? I’m not talking about faking it, winging it or pretending. Just going forward without debilitating doubts and fears.
3) as the card above says, be kind to others, they are struggling with their own stuff too! Yes, that successful person there has a retarded sibling, a dying mother, a difficult job, personal challenges, lack of time, poverty, sickness, overwhelming changes, lack of direction or a million other things.
If everyone realised this a giant wall would come crashing down (and probably society would cease to operate as it does). Maybe these insights are good to keep hacking away at the wall each day…
I love the PostSecret project for disseminating a deluge of cards with personal ‘secrets’ written over them… each week a new batch… a new insight into the hidden life of all of us.